Father asked us this morning at Mass what miracle we have witnessed recently? He said a miracle has two parts... "a miracle is where God is present and that the person knows Gods love."
When I think of a miracle I think of a person being healed from a terminal illness, a disaster that has been avoided, a soul that has been saved, a softening of the most hardend of hearts, an obivious and clear answer to the begging and pleading of one on their knees.
I haven't witnessed that kind of miracle... Yet.
With Thomas being sick these last five months, I fully expected to see that kind of miracle. I was sure on Easter Sunday he would wake up and be healed. I was more certain the day of Pope St. John Paul II's canonization, that Thomas would wake up and his headache would be gone since he was the saint that Thomas picked for his confirmation name. Then it was Pentecost, where I hoped the Holy Spirit show us a sign by Thomas feeling better. Of course none of this happened. And I'm embarrassed to say that I began to get frustrated, angry, and disappointed with God. "Where is that sign? Where is the miracle? You told us Lord to knock and ask and it shall be given to you." I felt like my wrists were bruised from knocking so hard. "Why won't you answer me Lord?"
After coming home from the Mayo Clinic, I was more discouraged. What was I hoping for? The doctors to see him for two days and cure him?
Well yes. That would be a miracle, right?
Instead we came home to his headaches even more intense.
He's completely off one of his three medications, and we are tapering off the second right now. We have gotten glimpses of seeing the old Thomas back, he's been smiling and laughing more, more like his old self!
We signed Thomas up for leadership camp months ago, and he had been looking forward to this week since last summer when his buddy Joe went and came home all excited. It's a full week of physical activity, while learning and growing in their faith. It's led by the most vibrant and enthusiastic priest I have ever met! We decided the day before camp started that he should give it a try. It's a little intimidating not knowing how Thomas will handle a full day activities when his head is still hurting, but I am so glad he wanted to go. Even if he only stays one or two days, at least he will have the experience of it.
My mother's heart is beating wildly. Driving him out to Camp and leaving him there, not alone but not with TJ or I, was hard for me. But I know this is the perfect place for him to be. For God is most definitely present there at camp among the dozens of sweaty boys, and I know Thomas is feeling His love.
A miracle if I ever saw one.